Sometimes Will and I have foolishly high aspirations. Today, there was an art festival in a nearby town, and we took the girls.
Here’s how we thought/hoped it would go:
We arrive at the art festival. We look at booths of beautiful art. We make sure the girls do not grab and break anything. The girls enjoy looking at things. The artists comment on how adorable and well behaved our children are. I buy kettle corn, and we sit in the shade and enjoy it. Mellow gets tired, and naps in her stroller. We buy delicious food from some vendors, and Wildling eats what she ordered without complaining. After a fun day of looking at art (and maybe buying something for the garden?) we drive home. It is an hour drive, and the kids nap peacefully on the way home. What a lovely day!
Here’s how it actually went:
We arrive at the art festival. Mellow does not want to ride in her stroller. Wildling does want to ride in Mellow’s stroller, but then she straps herself in, can’t unstrap herself, and freaks out. Mellow takes off running in every direction, and then repeatedly sits down in the middle of the road, tries to remove her shoe, and cries. I buy kettle corn. Mellow licks a few pieces then gives them to Wildling. Wildling cries because we sit in the shade to eat and she wants to sit directly on top of Will and he doesn’t immediately let her, plus he briefly moves the kettlecorn to a place she doesn’t want it.
Mellow cries and cries and nurses and cries. At naptime, after she nurses to sleep on me, I attempt to put her into the stroller and she immediately becomes a rabid contortionist eel. After a mighty struggle, I finally manage to strap her down. Wildling and I go to look at art while Will walks the screaming stroller baby around in the desperate hope that the movement of the stroller will lull her to sleep. Fifteen minutes later, after getting some unhelpful and unsolicited comments from nosy people who think they know our daughter better than we do, he gives up and takes her out. Meanwhile, I buy Wildling an overpriced strawberry lemonade to share. It has two straws. Mellow touches both straws, leading to a complete Wildling breakdown because ‘She’s always going to drink it all and she’s never going to share.’ Will manages to calm her down and talks her into walking the two steps back to Mellow to share the lemonade, but … there is a leashed dog sleeping two feet away, which, of course, leads to another meltdown. Because there is a dog, right there!!!!
Lunchtime. Wildling wants a quesadilla. Will offers part of it to Mellow (without asking! Wildling cries!), and then when Mellow rejects it, puts it back on Wildling’s plate. BUT SHE DOES NOT WANT IT THERE! Cue meltdown. Will tries to calm her down…but sets his gyro on top of Wildling’s plate! Cue meltdown again. Wildling finally finishes most of her meal. I had promised her soft serve ice cream, so I still buy it for her. I tell her she has to share with Mellow. She agrees to do so…but Mellow touches the cone! Cue meltdown.
Now the girls share ice cream, and numerous people stop by to tell us it’s adorable and we needed to take a picture. But Mellow is crushing the cone in her hand and every time she is made to give it back to Wildling (‘She’s never gonna let me have a turn! Never!‘), she collapses in a screaming heap of misery. Meanwhile, Wildling is crying because some ice cream dripped on her. Wildling needs an emergency wardrobe change. She decides she is finished with ice cream. Mellow continues eating, but the cone has been destroyed on one side, so Mellow’s hands are covered in ice cream, and she DOES NOT LIKE IT! Now there’s yet another Mellow meltdown.
It is hot, we are tired. Wildling is riding in the stroller, because Mellow won’t. Mellow wants to walk, but she doesn’t really want to, she wants to cry and stop and take her shoes off and walk back the way we came. Will ends up carrying her. She is exhausted and cries herself to sleep. We find the car and go home. Mellow sleeps (finally, hours after naptime, so bedtime is going to be rough) and Wildling spends the car ride making plans for how she will spend the car ride on an upcoming mini-vacation.