Wildling does ballet

Wildling has decided that she is a ballerina. She now teaches me ballet moves, that she learned from the book Olivia the Ballerina. Things to keep in mind: Olivia the Ballerina is not a how-to guide; and Olivia is a pig. Wildling has never seen actual ballet, and her dance moves and teachings reflect that.

I did have her signed up for a ballet class once, when she was three. She was ridiculously excited about it, up until the moment she had to enter the classroom door. Then all hell broke loose, and a few of my mom friends suddenly learned what I meant when I referenced Wildling’s screaming fits. We made a second attempt the following week, and again, didn’t make it through the classroom door and the teacher told me that Wildling was too disruptive and she was not welcome in the class (nice thing to say in front of a child – good thing Wildling couldn’t hear it over the sounds of her own screams).

So tonight, when Wildling earned some after dinner playtime, we spent it doing Wildling’s version of ballet. It involves a lot of spinning in circles, and a crazy ‘ballet walk’ which is kind of similar to what a zombie would do if they leaned all the way over from side to side while doing their brain-seeking shuffle.

I’m tempted to again attempt a real ballet class, but I’m worried that it won’t meet Wildling’s expectations. I don’t know what she thinks ballet is, other than a chance to wear a tutu. I took a ballet class when I was her age, and I enjoyed it until the teacher decided to humiliate me one day for the crime of -gasp – daring to wear a ballet skirt that my aunt had sent me. I wasn’t old enough or advanced enough to be permitted to wear one at that school, and instead of quietly informing me of that, the teacher decided to make an example of me and verbally tear me down and belittle me in front of the entire class. I cried, a lot, when I got home, and I never went back to that class. I worry that if I enroll Wildling in a class (assuming she enters the actual classroom this time), then one negative experience like mine will destroy her love of dancing.

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